This weekend is cause for celebration. Most people will be ringing in the new year. I, however will be ringing in the 10- week mark.
WE MADE IT!
Or, we will make it on Sunday. One more day. Another day another destiny.
Wait, I'm not gonna quote Les Miz, because right now, I'm anything but miserable, aside from the morning sickness. What I am is lucky to have made it this far. I'm still in shock.
The celebration won't last long. Monday I go in for the MaterniT21 blood test. This is the thing that keeps me awake at night. The worry that one - or both - of these babies might not be healthy. Please let my babies be healthy. The results take a week to get back, so, by January 8, we'll know more.
I got to see my little fetuses this week. Another milestone. Now that I'm about to enter Week 10, in my 3rd month of this pregnancy, these tiny babes have been upgraded from embryos to official fetuses. Woot woot!
We celebrate every milestone in my house because too often we haven't made it.
I went and saw my OB on Wednesday. I almost threw up on the table, not because of morning sickness, but nerves. I broke out in hives across my chest. I was a wreck. I keep thinking these appointments will get easier, but they don't.
It had been a week since my last appointment. At my last visit, my fertility doctor had taken me off my progesterone oil injections, something I was grateful for. I'd been taking them for more than two months. That is a LOT of needles. They hurt. Plus, they leave these hard marble sized spots across your bum.
It was to the point where I couldn't sling my camera over my shoulder, or put my hand on my hip without wincing in pain. I was so relieved when I was told I could stop.
My excitement was tempered with worry that somehow these babies were just sticking around for the good drugs and, once I stopped bribing them, they would jump ship like some deadbeat musician who you think really loves you but ends up just using you, eating all your Captain Crunch and taking advantage of a free place to crash.
My OB could see my worry when he entered the room. He asked if I had any questions before starting and, like the true emotional wreck I am, I said "I don't want to ask anything until I'm sure they are both still in there." He calmed me down a bit and got me into my usual, spread eagle in stirrups, position.
In went the dildo cam and up on the screen came those two little heartbeats. I started to cry.
Neither were moving.
Finally Baby A, on the bottom, began a spastic jig and we watched as he/she somersaulted in to Baby B, waking them. Baby B then began doing a little dance. Suddenly the screen was alive with movement. These two little wombmates were already harassing one another and all seemed right with the world.
Watching them dance on the screen I could breath easy, relax and enjoy the moment. I can envision our life as 5. Everyday the picture is getting clearer. In that beautiful moment, even the nausea passed. Until I returned home and witnessed my son poop on the potty and my dog swoop in and eat it. Then the nausea returned with a vengeance. CUE DRY HEAVING. That dog is literally a shit head.
2016, you were a long hard year. And while we haven't always seen eye to eye, this is the year we made our babies. For that I am forever grateful. Not to mention all the special moments we got to share with my son, our very first miracle.
So, everyone grab a glass of champagne. Or if you are pregnant like me, ginger ale.
Let’s make a toast - to new life, new beginnings and new adventures.
I'm wishing you all a happy new year, from my growing family to yours.
See you next year!